Catholic Church announces new sins

In a hail mary attempt to disconnect with the youth of today, the Pope has announced 7 new "social sins", which will allow the Future of America™ to rebel in modern ways like using birth control or littering. No longer is being lazy enough to fully earn God's ire, one now needs engineer massive socio-economic changes like creating poverty. The full list of the 7 nu-sins follows:

† "Bioethical" violations such as birth control
† "Morally dubious" experiments such as stem cell research
† Drug Abuse
† Polluting the environment
† Contributing to widening divide between rich and poor
† Excessive wealth
† Creating Poverty

For those attempting to check off all the items their unholy bucket list, here are the O.G. 7 Deadly Sins:

† Pride
† Envy
† Gluttony
† Lust
† Anger
† Greed
† Sloth

Hurry, hurry! Last one to the great white thone of judgement is a rotten egg who won't get punished for sin after the general ressurection and last judgement!